4.17.2010

Adam at the Office

Here's a fun excerpt from a book on relationships for girls that I'm writing. Thankfully, it didn't happen this way . . . (=

Adam pushed the elevator button. Tenth floor, all the way to the top. The door opened to an empty elevator cage.

Good, thought Adam, I’m not in the mood for chit chat right now.

As the door closed and the elevator made its ascent, Adam glanced at his watch and cringed. This meeting had better be quick. He had one hour before he had to get back to the estate and care for his menagerie of fowl. Not a bad job . . . but alone it was more than he could handle.

The elevator came to a smooth halt outside his landlord’s office. Adam straightened his tie before the long mirror in the hall. A quick look said “good enough,” and he raised his hand to knock.

“Come in.”

Adam entered, putting on his best serious yet professional demeanor.

“Adam!” God’s face broke into a smile as He stood to give Adam a firm hand clasp. “What brings you here? How’s the estate?”

“About that.” Adam cleared his throat. “We need to talk.”

God, concerned, sat down behind His well polished and organized desk. “What is it?”

“I appreciate my inheritance and all. Extremely generous of you.” Adam swung his lap top up onto the desk. “But it’s too much! I spend hours caring for the gardens and animals, not to mention the house. And then there’s the paperwork. I’m no administrator! And have you ever tried to talk to a pregnant elephant? I don’t have the touch! They’re so – so emotional!”

Adam opened his laptop to display his long to do list as he continued, “Housework and flowers aren’t my thing. And besides, it’s lonely out there. How am I supposed to communicate with crocodiles on my level? All they care about is their daily meals. Really, God, I’ve just about had all I can take!”

Down came the computer screen. Adam shoved the laptop into the bag and sank back against his chair.

“But, Adam, the last time we talked, you liked the estate.”

“I do! Just not . . . alone.”

At the word “alone,” God relaxed in his chair and rubbed His jaw thoughtfully. “Alone?”

“Yes, alone.”

God had never considered thousands of acres of land and hundreds of animal species as being “alone.” Seemed like entertaining company . . . until He thought about the messes. And the sweaty yard work with accompanying grass stains.

“Tell you what, Adam, I’ll give it some thought. Surely we can resolve this somehow.”

Adam sighed. “Thank you. The sooner the better.”

God saw Adam to the door. He hated to see his prized tenant so distraught. Adam had never complained before, so surely this was a sincere request. He had to put some deep thought into this issue. Heaven knew He didn’t see this one coming.

Behind His desk once more, God pulled out a stack of files. Surely He had some notes on relationships . . .


Hey, your role is important, ladies!