I'll Find Him With You IIII: The Guy

I know it's tempting to think, "With these kind of standards, I'll never get married! I don't know any guys who live like this!" Guess what? There are guys out there who are worth the wait. In our culture, they seem to be getting a little harder to come by, but they do exist. I've met some of them. In fact, one of those guys is my brother. Both of us were working on similar songs at the same time, but we didn't have a clue what each other's lyrics were. We finished our songs and compared notes . . . and found they held the same priority and values. We had never discussed this topic before! "Yeah," you might say, "but you grew up together!" Very true. But the fact still remains - there ARE guys out there who's hearts are set on God's best.

Hide and Seek
I could search forever for the perfect girl,
But the one reserved for me, yeah, she the best in the world,
So I'll close my eyes and count to three,
And wonder who's awaiting me,
I know that I will find the one someday.
You hide, and I'll seek His face,
'Cause I know good things come to those who wait.
You hide; I'll seek, and I know someday I'll find you.
Grace is one in a million, and virtue's hard to find,
But when I know Who's leading me, I leave my fears behind,
So I'll close my eyes and count to three,
And wonder what's in store for me,
Enjoy the ride, 'cause He is in control.
I'll close my eyes and count to three,
And wonder what's awaiting me,
Until true love is meant to be,
I'll trust the Lord in ev'rything,
I'll close my eyes and seek His face,
And watch the pieces fall in place,
And by His grace I know I'll find the one.
(c) 2007 Words and Music by Tim Heider/SoundMind Music

Cool, huh? If you'll notice in my first posting on this topic (I'll Find Him With You: The Song), the common denominator between our songs is seeking God. See, God's not limited in anything. He knows this world and who's in it upside down and sideways. If He could create the world and orchestrate everyone's lives in it, how could He go wrong bringing you and your future mate together? What He's looking for is two people who's lives are sincerely focused on Him. Two lives who are willing to believe that trust is the constant and time is the variable. If you're willing to follow God's perfect plan for your life in every detail, you will find yourself at the right place at the right time. And suddenly Mr. Right will be knocking at your door!

As the last article on "I'll Find Him With You," I want encourage you -- trust God to be your matchmaker. He knows you and your future mate better than anyone else. And He loves you, His daughter and Princess, far more than any man ever could!



I'll Find Him With You III: The Standard

"Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they're afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead they get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples up top think that something's wrong with them when in reality they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along - the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree."

Okay, so now you feel a little more confident about being single. You're willing to wait for God's best, and enjoy the season you're in right now. But guess what - the challenge isn't over! YOU might be content, but there are guys out there that aren't. If you've been around a few years, you've probably discovered that you "attract" guys that aren't quite your type. Or maybe you just REALLY like a guy, but you're not sure if he's the right one. How do you know if you should even allow yourself to like him? That's when standards are a must! Standards are guidelines that you set for yourself (based on God's Word), and are totally unwilling to compromise. They keep you from making decisions that are going to hurt you. Let's look at couple that definitely can't be compromised if you want to follow God's plan toward God's best.

Standard #1: He's got to be a Christian!
This may seem like a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised how many girls are willing to ignore this one. "I'm in love!" they say, and then go ahead with their plans. And they suffer for it. Why? Because you're trying to mix God with the world, and the two DON'T mix. I Corinthians 6:14 says, "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?" Not only will you be disobeying God, but you're opening yourself to misery. He'll either influence you to lose your faith, or you'll spend years regretting that you never fulfilled God's plan for your life. Yikes! Don't go there!

Standard #2: He's got to be the Leader!
I don't know about you, but a weak guy really gets to me. One that won't take responsibility for his own life definitely couldn't take responsibility for mine. Check out Ephesians 5:22, "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." Submitting doesn't mean that you have to crawl at his feet like a lowly servant. It simply means that you recognize his leadership role, and are willing to defer to his decision-making. But if a guy doesn't have the character, willingness, or the strength to lead your home in every area, you're going to have a hard time submitting. Your role as a wife is very important! But a role as wife AND husband just doesn't work!

Standard #3: He's got to have the same Standards!
Personality and taste differences between you is a given. Though you'll have your similarities in interests and gifts, God often puts opposites together to balance each other out. But "opposite" does not mean different standards. For instance, both of you may be saved, but one of you may condone a little drinking, and the other have a strong conviction against it. Or maybe the type of movies you watch could vary. Just make sure that you're going in the same direction with your life. The call of God on your lives and the convictions you hold should flow together, not against each other. And remember, a person's personal life - what they do for entertainment, who they hang out with, etc. - say a lot about the person.

I've had guys like me, and have had to make decisions outside of my emotions. It's hard sometimes, huh? Especially when you like them a lot. But in the long run, it's worth it. It saves you from heartache and giving up something that's precious to both you and your Heavenly Father. And I promise, your future mate is going to be SO pleased that you kept your standards - for him and him alone!

You can do it, Princess!